Reconciling Two Loves: Motherhood and Horses
universe to become oriented towards the responsibility of nurturing someone else. Motherhood renovated my character, although I wasn’t completely whole.
At the very least, an experiment was necessary to try to fill the missing piece. I needed to gauge the possibility of balancing motherhood with the horse world, so the first test began as a weekly riding lesson with fellow amateur ladies.
With the overdue but familiar step into the stirrups, and then settling into the saddle for the first time in that new lifetime, my horse elevated me. Returning to the back of a horse was as uplifting as the long-anticipated embrace of a dearly missed friend. But as those reunions often go, an element felt different than how I remembered. Fortunately, change often implies growth. The new connection I shared with these animals was kinder and more mature than before.
The experiment of riding as a new mother erased my doubts and inspired my hope. Each night when I return home from a visit with horses, I snuggle with my baby boy even longer, kiss his perfect face more often, and overwhelm him with affection. It became clear that spending time with horses wasn’t selfish, for horses made me a better mother. The brief retreat into my horse haven recharges the inevitable maternal fatigue and improves the interactions my child and I share.
Horses and children share my heart. Yet, my love isn’t simply divided between them. Instead, they compliment, enhance, and restore each other, partnered with meaningful compatibility, just like a mother and father, or the balance between productivity and rest, creativity and rationality — one relies upon the other to excel.
