Dealing With Jealousy

useless.
It was a big step for Chris to acknowledge that it was his own fear that was holding him back. Once he identified the threat he summed it up like this I am scared that without some of the advantages other riders have I wont be able to make it in the horse business. With this truth out in the open he was then able to identify some cool thoughts that he could use to anchor himself whenever he felt the pangs of jealousy begin
Cool thinking
Cool thoughts are those that reestablish your equilibrium. They balance your perspective and enable you to get back to business. As an added bonus they help you feel better about yourself rather than feel the shame that often accompanies jealousy.
In order to arrive at a cool mindset youll have to begin to challenge your existing inner chatter. For Chris he had to acknowledge the flaws in his current thought patterns
Hot thought They are going to get ahead and Im not.
Cool thought I dont know this for sure. I am just assuming they will because I want what they have.
Hot thought I wont ever be able to ride in the divisions I want.
Cool thought Not true. It will likely just be on a different timetable than some of my competitors.
Hot thought Its not fair they have all the advantages
Cool thought They have some advantages and so do I.
Hot thought I might as well give up. Its useless.
Cool thought I dont want to give up I want to come up with a plan to feel and ride better.
The next time he faced a competitive situation Chris was ready with some key thoughts that could redirect his focus. He also added a visual image. Each time he felt his thoughts drift toward his competitors he saw a ball bouncing off their heads and returning to him. It was a way of reminding himself to keep his energy and its benefits for himself. He made a game out of seeing how many times he could successfully catch the ball and hang on to it. When he got his ball back he would say ride the horse and the plan youve got. It was his way of reminding himself to stay on track and not compare his riding career with others. The more he focused on his own experience the more he could make it into something great.
Identify your own